Life On The Street (Part 5)

In the past 2 years I’ve had two close friends who have lost a spouse. When I’m with them I can see their pain and I hurt inside for them. But I have no idea how they feel. The problem is when we try to relate to a person who has suffered a great loss we try to get in their shoes and we really can’t understand how they feel because we haven’t felt what they feel. It is really the same thing with the homeless. When we deal with homeless people we often do the same thing. We try to act like we understand their pain, which unless we have gone through it we have no idea what it feels like. So your next question is “What should we do?” LOVE THEM.

Love crosses all borders, breaks all walls, Love changes lives. One of my favorite verses in the Bible is 1 John 3:18 “Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth.” I think this verse unlocks the door to how we can relate to the homeless. We need to stop talking about how much we love them and SHOW THEM!!!!!!! I’m afraid that the Church in the US has become really good at telling people about love and not showing them, “with actions”. When I read this verse it really convicts me to shut my mouth and love someone.

When someone first becomes homeless it might take a couple good breaks to get them off the street, but after a period of time it is going to be allot tougher. The only thing that will be able to break the cycle at that point is love. So how can you love a person that is homeless? Well to start with you will have to spend time with them. Can’t love someone unless you spend time with them. Have you ever really loved some that you never meet. The second thing is don’t look for results. People hate to feel manipulated, so don’t have strings attached to your love. Love is the only thing that is going to change their situation, but who made you God. Maybe God’s plan doesn’t line up with what you think a change looks like.  Finally, get yourself a snickers candy bar “Because you might not be going anywhere for a while” I’ve had homeless people that I’ve been sharing love with for over 5 years and I’ve seen zero change. This one is the hardest part, because sometimes I feel like I’m wasting my time. Let me make a general statement, it is never a waste of time when you love someone.

Come back Friday and I will share a couple of stories of how this is true

 

 

 

 

 

Life On The Street (Part 4)

When I work as an engineer, I worked for a company that installed software systems on US Navy Ships. The navy took one of its ships The USS Yorktown and made it completely computerized, since I was one of the software experts I had to go underway with the ship for 6 weeks. For the first 2 weeks I hated it, I gained a new level of respect for people who are in the US Navy. If you are in the Navy I just want to take a minute to say thanks. Well back to me on the ship after about a month something weird started happening, I started getting into a routine. I started to get comfortable being on the ship; although, just two weeks earlier I hated it. I think what happened to me on the ship is the same thing that happens to homeless people on the street. What happens is people who are homeless begin to get comfortable, to cope with the circumstance that they find themselves in.

When someone first becomes homeless they will do anything to get off the street, but after you have been on the street for about 6 month or more you begin to become comfortable with being on the street. It is not that the person is really comfortable with being on the street; however, they are beginning to look comfortable to cope just like I did on the Navy ship. Let me repeat there is nothing comfortable with being on the street. You will hear people say things like “he or she wants to be homeless”; it’s not that they want to be homeless. What you see is someone who is beginning to look comfortable as a coping mechanism.  Life as a homeless person in Virginia Beach becomes very structured; in order to eat you need to be at certain places at certain times. So they need to be on scheduled. Also once you find a safe place to sleep you will continue to sleep there as long as you can until the police push you out or someone destroys your place.

So how is PIN helping homeless people in this phase of homelessness? First, we are trying to help build a sense of self worth in them. So how do we create self worth in the homeless, by helping them to see themselves through God’s eyes? If homeless people and really everyone can see ourselves the way God see’s us then it will make us live a more fulfilled lives. Secondly, PIN is helping the homeless by trying to help them to make wiser decisions. We offer a biblical service, recovery groups, and counseling to put them on and help them stay in the right direction. Finally, I believe that we are helping the homeless by simple loving them. There are people who are homeless that haven’t felt loved in decades sometimes ever and we believe that if we can help make them feel loved it will change how they feel about themselves.

 

Life On The Street (Part 3)

So you are now homeless. Well at least for this post you have to image that you are homeless. I hope this is the closest you ever come to being homeless. The first thing you need to do is find someplace to eat. There are allot of places to eat, but you will need to find them.  At the oceanfront you can have lunch at the Star of The Sea Catholic Church on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and you can also get lunch at the Potter’s House at the Virginia Beach United Methodist Church on Tuesday and Thursday. You can also get dinner at Judeo Christian Outreach Center (JCOC) every evening of the week. PIN provides breakfast every Saturday morning and dinner every Sunday evening as well as a bag lunch. So there are meals available in Virginia Beach if you know and can get to these places. If you have a job getting to the places may be your issue. Kerry can probable explain that scenario.

So now you need to find a place to sleep and that is going to be your biggest problem. There is a lack of places to sleep in Virginia Beach so you are going to probable have to find a place to sleep outside. Between JCOC, Samaritan House, Seton House, and VSCDC there are 168 total beds which are identified by the city as emergency beds. These beds are always full with a waiting list.  In the winter time between October and March there are seasonal (winter) shelter available they have space for 64 people with a capacity of 78 on dangerously cold nights. The winter shelter is churches opening up their buildings to let homeless people sleep on the floor. The problem is that that is not enough shelter for all the people that are homeless so people continue to have to sleep on the street. Are you upset yet….? The next issue is specific to Virginia Beach during the winter families live in hotels at the oceanfront, then they are displaced during the summer as tourist take over the oceanfront. There are over 400 people that fit in this scenario. When you add all this up Virginia Beach is definitely not the city to be homeless in.

Come back next week when we look at what begins to happen to you after you have been homeless for 6 months.

 

Life On The Street (Part 2)

My son started his first day of high school on September 2^nd, and it was a very nervous day for him. I remember as I talked to my son the night before his first day of high school, he was going through the stress of the unknown. He was now entering something that was unknown and scary. As I talked to my son, I could remember the night before my first day of high school, and although that was a long time ago it felt as though it was a couple weeks ago. Can you remember how you felt before your first day of high school? Now imagine it’s not the first day of high school, but it is your first day of homelessness. Imagine the range of emotions you will go through.

For a second I want you to imagine that you don’t have a place to live and you are going to be homeless tonight. You are going to go through several emotions all at once; the first emotion you are going to suffer is fear. Where will I sleep, since I’ve never been homeless where can I sleep and be safe. You probably don’t realize that as soon as you go to sleep you are breaking the law “See our blog series it’s against the law to be homeless”. Where can I sleep and not have to worry about being hurt. What is going to happen especially for young people is someone who is already homeless will come with a smiling face; this person may not have the best intentions in mind. They may be looking to take advantage of the situation and are going to manipulate the situation. The sad thing is once you first become homeless the first homeless person that reaches out to you may not always have your best interest in heart.

When you first become homeless you are still holding out hope that you can get off the street pretty quickly, if I can just get a good break or make a couple changes I can change my situation. Feeling this way is a good emotion once you begin to lose this emotion you will begin to make homelessness you life. Part of what PIN tries to do to help people in this situation is to give them hope that they can change their situation.

Come back on Friday when we will discuss what are the options for a homeless person who is on the street, as far as food, and shelter.

 

Life On The Street (Part 1)

The next couple of weeks I want to focus this blog on what it is like to be homeless. Now I want to start by saying I’ve never actually been homeless. So I will be drawing on my experience working with the homeless and conversations I’ve had with them over the years. I will also ask Kerry to comment in case I’m missing the boat on anything I say. So I’m going to break the series into 4 sections that looks at different segments of life as a homeless person in Virginia Beach. First, we will look at when people first become homeless; basically we will start with the first day of homelessness and will focus on emotions and details related to the early stages. The second stage we will look at occurs after you have been homeless for 6 months. During this stage you are starting to get in routes that are becoming part of your life. During this stage you are beginning to think you can’t get off the street. The third stage is after I’ve been homeless for a long time. In this stage, I’m having trouble remembering what my life was like before I was homeless, and I’m not sure if getting off the street is an option for me. The 4th stage I will investigate will be getting off the street and all the challenges that I face in that stage.

During these series of post I will try to look at it through the eyes of the homeless, and how they feel. I will also try to explain how PIN is trying to help people.